After a smear test recently, I discovered that I have severe dyskaryosis of trhe cervix. I have to admit that I cried when I first read the letter from the hospital. I'd expected my smear test results to come back all clear, believing I was too young to have cancer or anything like that. And being rather uneducated in the field of "women troubles", I feared the worst.

Thankfully, my GP, the staff at the hospital, my father and the internet all managed to convince me that it isn't cancer: it's actually an abnormality of my cervix which could one day become cancer if not treated. Meaning ten to fifteen years from now. Thank God!

Yet I am still anxious. I need to go for treatment, which involved having the abnormal cells scraped off using a process called diathermy. I know it's nothing particularly serious: I'll be in and out of the out-patients' department in less than an hour; after effects will include only period pains and bleeding for a couple of weeks. However, I hate the thoughts of having to spread my legs again in front of a room of strangers (as I did during my colposcopy a couple of weeks back); I'm worried that the poroblem may not go away; I'm worried about being ill when the kids need me to be super mommy.

But at the end of the day, I'm so happy that the problem isn't cancer or any other serious abnormality. My problem can be treated quickly and easily; I shouldn't worry about it, I'll be fine. I know I will, deep down.

I just wish this anxiety would go away...

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